Am I ready?

As I am getting ready to post this, I am sitting at my kitchen counter checking to make sure I have everything I need. I have my carry-on packed. I have my backpack packed. That’s my go to when I travel. I have my ticket. I have snacks and water.

I have a lot of emotions flowing through me. I have a lot of questions being asked of me by myself. Did you do enough? Did you work hard? Do you think you will do well? Do you feel ready? Can you go?

Well…the answer is I’m not sure. All the doubt is creeping in. The negative talk is telling me I didn’t do enough. The negative talk is telling me I didn’t work hard enough. The negative talk is telling me I won’t do well. The negative talk is telling me I’m not ready and I can’t go.

I feel empty. My tank feels low. It’s been a long road. I’ve had injuries to overcome and just when I am starting to feel good it’s time to go. But can I?

Guess what? We all have shit. We all have problems. We all have life. We all have something we have to deal with. It’s not new to any of us.

The important thing is to not dwell on the negative talk. I’m trying hard not to do that. I’m trying hard to stay positive. I’m trying hard.

If you are wondering what I am talking about. I am talking about my recertification for my kettlebell certification. I have to recert every three years. I am certified level I and level II right now and this is the recertification for both of those. It’s not easy AT ALL. It’s exhausting, mentally and physically.

The Master instructor is Dan John. Ever heard of him? He’s kind of a big deal. I am super excited to work with him. He truly is an amazing coach and more importantly an amazing person. I will probably fan girl all over him. I did pack one of his books so he can sign it for me. Weird? Not at all. He’s that amazing of a person.

So tomorrow morning I hop in the car about 5:30 a.m. and head to Rapid City. I catch a plane to Denver and then to LA – the land of the pretty people. I will Uber of Lyft to the hotel because I’m sure as hell not renting a car and driving in that traffic.

I get to see my good friend Rene again. I absolutely love her. We hit it off immediately at our Level II three years ago and then the Progressive Calisthentics Certification. Talk about an amazing person. She is one of a kind. Such a beautiful person with an absolutely beautiful soul. She is such an inspiration. NOTHING keeps her down.

Even though my tank is feeling empty. I am not going to use that an an excuse. I am going to dig deeper. I’m going to push harder. I’m going to be uncomfortable as fuck and I am going to grow!

Rene – let’s do this!!