Memories of loved ones lost. It’s always hard. This time of year, holidays, other days, maybe even all days. Looking at pictures of them. Wondering about them. The what ifs. The whys. Do you ever hold an actual picture and study it? Looking at the faces and the scenery—the background and wondering what was happening in that actual moment.

I noticed today when I picked up a picture of Sandy. On the back it said, “10/02/02 Sandy’s last ride.” 

It was a picture of her at the Buffalo Ranch. She was standing behind her motorcryle. Beside hers was Nancy’s. The opening to the ranch had two big rock posts. It looked like a beautiful fall day. Her face held her beautiful smile. She always had that. No matter what. I found myself trying to zoom the picture bigger. I took my thumb and forefinger and moved them apart, trying to bring her face into focus. Trying to see. I wanted to see her face closer. I wanted to see her smile closer. Her eyes, and her hair. I wanted to see her clearer. I wanted to see her better. I wanted to remember her clearer and better. 

I took a picture of the picture with my phone. And then, I zoomed it closer. There it was. There she was. The smile. The laugh. The positive.

Missing you today Sandy.

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